i really want to sleep
It's another night up til late. I lay in bed and my mind just won't shut off. I can't lay still enough long enough to fall asleep. My watch says I slept 6 hrs - with real sleep 3 hrs 20 mins. I was in bed for almost 9 hrs, oh wait- I got up and did laundry at 12:30 this morning. I figured since I am laying here might as well do something- the list of all that needs to get done is long and growing as I lay here. Might as well knock some of it out. Tonight I figure since I can't sleep I would get some work done. Now, I am not only tired and really want to sleep but can't but I am listening to my dog whine from his room because he hears me typing. Really? Now irritation takes over. Oh Lord, help me!! Seriously, I should be sleeping. I know that come 6:30 I will not want out of bed. I will rely on Starbucks to keep me going tomorrow.
You hear how people get hungangry well I get sleepangry. I need my sleep, I want my sleep. This should only happen when stress is going on. I don't feel overly stressed. Humm, maybe I should be stressed. Or maybe I should be getting stuff done. I have plenty to do and keep pushing off for another day. Maybe my feelings are not right. Maybe I am totally deceived by my thoughts??
The heart is deceitful above all, the heart is evil. Funny how the Bible warns us about how not to trust to our heart and yet Disney and the World say to follow your heart, do what your heart feels, trust your heart. oh my!! oh bother!! Really? If I followed my heart it would be trouble- my heart says yes and my mind says no. Growing up "G" would say "Don't let fear and common sense stand in your way". I see now what he was really saying was - "don't trust your heart,think about the consequences before you make a stupid decision". Really if we thought through how our decisions would play out I really don't think we would make 80% of them or more. Ever think back to a choice you made and think "that was stupid"?? I am sure you have, we all have! I think back to so many things in my life and shake my head. Thankful for the grace of God!!
God's grace! Where would I be without God's Grace!! I would be facing an eternity of hell apart from the Lord. I am thankful that I do not have to do anything to gain my salvation nor can I loose it!! In the times when my sin blinds my fear and common sense I am thankful for a God who does not require me to do anything to gain my salvation. I am thankful that it is not left up to me or that I have anything of worth for the Lord or for others. I am thankful that any good or any clear thinking is not my own but the Lord's. The moment I think I am worthy I place myself above Him!! God's grace what a perfect and amazing gift!!
Now Lord can you grant me the gift of sleep. please!! I really want good sleep! I will take just a couple hours if it is solid! Please Lord black circles under the eyes are not attractive. Living on caffeine is not the answer. Sleeping during the day, is not good. I need to sleep when the family sleeps and be up when the family is up. Please Lord!!
You hear how people get hungangry well I get sleepangry. I need my sleep, I want my sleep. This should only happen when stress is going on. I don't feel overly stressed. Humm, maybe I should be stressed. Or maybe I should be getting stuff done. I have plenty to do and keep pushing off for another day. Maybe my feelings are not right. Maybe I am totally deceived by my thoughts??
The heart is deceitful above all, the heart is evil. Funny how the Bible warns us about how not to trust to our heart and yet Disney and the World say to follow your heart, do what your heart feels, trust your heart. oh my!! oh bother!! Really? If I followed my heart it would be trouble- my heart says yes and my mind says no. Growing up "G" would say "Don't let fear and common sense stand in your way". I see now what he was really saying was - "don't trust your heart,think about the consequences before you make a stupid decision". Really if we thought through how our decisions would play out I really don't think we would make 80% of them or more. Ever think back to a choice you made and think "that was stupid"?? I am sure you have, we all have! I think back to so many things in my life and shake my head. Thankful for the grace of God!!
God's grace! Where would I be without God's Grace!! I would be facing an eternity of hell apart from the Lord. I am thankful that I do not have to do anything to gain my salvation nor can I loose it!! In the times when my sin blinds my fear and common sense I am thankful for a God who does not require me to do anything to gain my salvation. I am thankful that it is not left up to me or that I have anything of worth for the Lord or for others. I am thankful that any good or any clear thinking is not my own but the Lord's. The moment I think I am worthy I place myself above Him!! God's grace what a perfect and amazing gift!!
Now Lord can you grant me the gift of sleep. please!! I really want good sleep! I will take just a couple hours if it is solid! Please Lord black circles under the eyes are not attractive. Living on caffeine is not the answer. Sleeping during the day, is not good. I need to sleep when the family sleeps and be up when the family is up. Please Lord!!
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