Time is passing - Family Healing is happening.
So we are are 3 1/2 months past one of the worst night of my life. I honestly still sit and wonder if it all really happened, then I see my son and remember the nightmare is true. It was not a nightmare, it was reality.
When I think back to all that has happened in the last 3 1/2 months I am blown away by God's Grace. His pouring down Grace!
Thinking through this time I think about how Chris' life got hard, I mean really hard. Chris is not one who thinks travelling for work is fun. He does not look forward to hours in a car. He spent so many hours driving back n forth. His job and work life had to go on. Kyle had to go on with his life, he had school finals to take, work to do and add in extra responsibilities to his daily work load. Carmen also had to allow her life to go on with school and a new season of volleyball. Allee had to live life normally, work to pay bills and handle all the emotional stress of things her friends were also dealing with. April got thrown into big sister/parenthood. She went from a home of her and the pup to figuring things out at our house and be what I could not be to our kids. AS for Ashley and I our life really just stopped. Our life became Tyler and the doctors. I checked out of total life and was absorbed in hospital life.
Since being back to a normal schedule, it's not that its been hard, it's been adjusting! The past two weeks have been hard, I did not totally understand why its been so hard on me. I chalked it all up to hormones. Until I had, what some my call a "Come to Jesus moment" realizing that Chris and I have had NO time together, I have had no time with ladies where we encouraged each other. Chris and I had a hard heart to heart and the reality that we have not had time together hit me! We very soon after went for SweetFrog and have gone on some short walks. IT's amazing what time together with the love of your life can do to you!! This week I think I spent more time with ladies than I have in the last 3 1/2 months. I did not realize until recently how much I need time with ladies.
The last 3 1/2 months I have been so focused on what needs to be done, what needs to happen, what needs to be taken care of that I have not thought about relationships. People always say, "make sure you have time for you", "make sure you take care of yourself". What I really needed wasn't time for me- I had time for ME, and that made me withdraw even more from people. It made me not want to be around people because I needed time for me! What I needed and need is relationships, relationship number one with Christ- He is one who has showered us in Grace. I need relationship with others who will encourage me to be in His Word by doing it with me! Not asking me what I read or giving me a lesson that they just read, I need a relationship with someone who will take time for coffee and lets read a devotion together, lets read lets do something, together! Walking side by side with me. Not someone telling me how to "fix" things, how to endure, but someone saying lets go through this together! The last 3 1/2 months I have prayed so much through the day but opening His Word and reading it, my brain has not comprehended. I loved before Christmas when Tracy would send me devotions, they were short and encouraging. I loved having something short to read and understand. My brain reading through scripture felt like an unbeliever who did not understand God's Word.
I realized this week I need relationships! I need relationships here on Earth and I better have a relationship when I close my eyes for the last time!
The last 2 months being home feels like it has gone really fast and yet seems so long since we first came home. Allee is all settled in her new place, it looks great! Carmen was sick with flu, strep and a sinus infection all at the same time, along with the stomach bug a week before. Chris has been working so hard between Gathering stuff and work stuff. Kyle has been busy putting plans in motion that he has had on hold for a couple of months. It has been one busy household!
God's grace is showering on us yet still more - Tyler went back to the doctor and his pinky seems to be healing well so no surgery is needed! We are so thankful for that! Tyler is completely off one of his meds and beginning to come off the second one. He is on 3 total! So far, no issues and no side effects from coming off them. Tyler continues to make progress, He does not always remember all that is said but then again I don't either! He has more to go and we are still praying that he will be able to go back to school in the fall and live independently then. It is amazing to see how much he has healed in this short of time! He is working about 15 hrs a week!
And yet there's still more!!! God's grace is raining down! On February 24 Kyle asked Katelyn to be his bride! We have begun to plan the Wedding! So much excitement! We could not be happier, Kyle and Katelyn compliment eachother so well! And so this being Chris and I's 25 wedding anniversary year we have - watched our son heal, and helped our other son plan his day! So thankful for the blessing of being able to walk through these life events with our boys!!
And just encase I need to be reminded of the Grace of the Lord- I took pictures this week of Tyler's car.
I thank God every time I think of the hard times we have been through because I see grace pouring like rain down on us! Which by the way, I am done with the rain and cold! please go away!!
So where does this leave us? We are in a stage of life that we will never forget! We are celebrating each day of the grace of healing, the grace of new love, the grace of love that is lasting and more importantly we are celebrating Everlasting Love from our Lord Jesus Christ! Without Christ this would of looked so much different! The grace we had raining down would not look as beautiful and shiny as it did! Instead of sparkles and glitter it would of looked and felt like volcano ash!!
God's grace of Love has many different faces! We are thankful for the joy and tears of Grace!!
When I think back to all that has happened in the last 3 1/2 months I am blown away by God's Grace. His pouring down Grace!
Thinking through this time I think about how Chris' life got hard, I mean really hard. Chris is not one who thinks travelling for work is fun. He does not look forward to hours in a car. He spent so many hours driving back n forth. His job and work life had to go on. Kyle had to go on with his life, he had school finals to take, work to do and add in extra responsibilities to his daily work load. Carmen also had to allow her life to go on with school and a new season of volleyball. Allee had to live life normally, work to pay bills and handle all the emotional stress of things her friends were also dealing with. April got thrown into big sister/parenthood. She went from a home of her and the pup to figuring things out at our house and be what I could not be to our kids. AS for Ashley and I our life really just stopped. Our life became Tyler and the doctors. I checked out of total life and was absorbed in hospital life.
Since being back to a normal schedule, it's not that its been hard, it's been adjusting! The past two weeks have been hard, I did not totally understand why its been so hard on me. I chalked it all up to hormones. Until I had, what some my call a "Come to Jesus moment" realizing that Chris and I have had NO time together, I have had no time with ladies where we encouraged each other. Chris and I had a hard heart to heart and the reality that we have not had time together hit me! We very soon after went for SweetFrog and have gone on some short walks. IT's amazing what time together with the love of your life can do to you!! This week I think I spent more time with ladies than I have in the last 3 1/2 months. I did not realize until recently how much I need time with ladies.
The last 3 1/2 months I have been so focused on what needs to be done, what needs to happen, what needs to be taken care of that I have not thought about relationships. People always say, "make sure you have time for you", "make sure you take care of yourself". What I really needed wasn't time for me- I had time for ME, and that made me withdraw even more from people. It made me not want to be around people because I needed time for me! What I needed and need is relationships, relationship number one with Christ- He is one who has showered us in Grace. I need relationship with others who will encourage me to be in His Word by doing it with me! Not asking me what I read or giving me a lesson that they just read, I need a relationship with someone who will take time for coffee and lets read a devotion together, lets read lets do something, together! Walking side by side with me. Not someone telling me how to "fix" things, how to endure, but someone saying lets go through this together! The last 3 1/2 months I have prayed so much through the day but opening His Word and reading it, my brain has not comprehended. I loved before Christmas when Tracy would send me devotions, they were short and encouraging. I loved having something short to read and understand. My brain reading through scripture felt like an unbeliever who did not understand God's Word.
I realized this week I need relationships! I need relationships here on Earth and I better have a relationship when I close my eyes for the last time!
The last 2 months being home feels like it has gone really fast and yet seems so long since we first came home. Allee is all settled in her new place, it looks great! Carmen was sick with flu, strep and a sinus infection all at the same time, along with the stomach bug a week before. Chris has been working so hard between Gathering stuff and work stuff. Kyle has been busy putting plans in motion that he has had on hold for a couple of months. It has been one busy household!
God's grace is showering on us yet still more - Tyler went back to the doctor and his pinky seems to be healing well so no surgery is needed! We are so thankful for that! Tyler is completely off one of his meds and beginning to come off the second one. He is on 3 total! So far, no issues and no side effects from coming off them. Tyler continues to make progress, He does not always remember all that is said but then again I don't either! He has more to go and we are still praying that he will be able to go back to school in the fall and live independently then. It is amazing to see how much he has healed in this short of time! He is working about 15 hrs a week!
And yet there's still more!!! God's grace is raining down! On February 24 Kyle asked Katelyn to be his bride! We have begun to plan the Wedding! So much excitement! We could not be happier, Kyle and Katelyn compliment eachother so well! And so this being Chris and I's 25 wedding anniversary year we have - watched our son heal, and helped our other son plan his day! So thankful for the blessing of being able to walk through these life events with our boys!!
And just encase I need to be reminded of the Grace of the Lord- I took pictures this week of Tyler's car.
I thank God every time I think of the hard times we have been through because I see grace pouring like rain down on us! Which by the way, I am done with the rain and cold! please go away!!
So where does this leave us? We are in a stage of life that we will never forget! We are celebrating each day of the grace of healing, the grace of new love, the grace of love that is lasting and more importantly we are celebrating Everlasting Love from our Lord Jesus Christ! Without Christ this would of looked so much different! The grace we had raining down would not look as beautiful and shiny as it did! Instead of sparkles and glitter it would of looked and felt like volcano ash!!
God's grace of Love has many different faces! We are thankful for the joy and tears of Grace!!
Romans 5:15 New American Standard Bible (NASB)
15 But [a]the free gift is not like the transgression. For if by the transgression of the one the many died, much more did the grace of God and the gift by the grace of the one Man, Jesus Christ, abound to the many.
Romans 2:4 New American Standard Bible (NASB)
4 Or do you think lightly of the riches of His kindness and tolerance and patience, not knowing that the kindness of God leads you to repentance?
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